Jim "HACKSAW" Mackenzie

It’s taken me a while to put my thoughts down on paper, unsure of what to say.  The other night I was sitting there thinking about you when Mamasaw called.  We talked for almost an hour.  So many memories came up and so many of them mean so much that I really don’t think I can put them on paper. 

So many memories come to mind when I think about you.  One of the first ones is when you, me and Mamasaw went to Little Bear so many years ago.  She and I were dancing on the table. You stood there watching and laughing at us being drunk and having fun.  The bouncer came up to us and told Mamasaw to get down.  You turned around and said, “Hey, don’t yell at my mom”. The bouncer walked away.  We all looked at each other, laughed and she and I continued to dance.  What a great night. 

The next big one is at Cindy and Steve’s rehearsal dinner.  I was upset about being stood up.  So once again, Jim to the rescue.  Throughout the night you and I had a blast.  I stood there while you poured beer down my throat.  Steve’s mom was pissed but all that mattered was you and I having fun.  The best part of that moment is there is a picture. 

No matter how much time passed between us seeing each other, it was like we never missed a day.  Running into you at the Queensryche show.  I was so happy to see you and you me.  We talked, laughed and had a few beers.  It always seemed I ran into you at a show or some special event. 

The day Cindy and I got pierced, we all met at The Yard House.  What a good time we had.  Good food, good company and good laughs.  Making fun of some and wondering about others….ha!!

When I got divorced you and I got closer.  For that I am so grateful!!!  The first time you saw my daughter, what you thought of her and how she acted toward you..makes me smile.  She saw your picture the other day and said, “Uncle Hackie”.  I was so thankful she remembered.  That last Saturday when Aiden was sitting on your Harley hitting the throttle, I so wanted Courtney to get on there with you and do the same thing.  I remember watching and hearing you say, “That is the coolest thing I have ever seen” as you were laughing.  Courtney watched but did not want anything to do with being on that “loud motorcycle”. Ha. 

For some reason I can still see you and Steve dancing and singing the “Banana song”.  O my god was that funny!!  We were all so drunk trying to be part of the 100 beer club.  No way did we make it, you and Steve were closer than I was but we all sure tried to do it. 

I could go on and on but it would……….

Just know this my friend and brother.  Not one day goes by that I don’t think of you.  All of the times we were together….I truly miss you and sometimes I regret not telling you some things but I know deep in my heart that you know what I never told you.  I LOVE YOU and I can’t wait to join you on the ride where the roads are clear and wonderful.  Enjoy your ride until I can be there on the back with you.  I will see you someday but until then……….    

I've known Jim forever! I can not remember a time when he was not just a phone call away! He was a dear friend I would not even know where to start with all our many memories. He helped me through some very tough times, he was the one that held me up when I could not reach those stars! His laughter and one-liners "and if you knew him you know what I mean!!" they always made me smile! I am sooo blessed to have know him, he is in my heart a true friend!!

May the road rise to meet you, May the wind be always at your back, May the sun shine warm upon your face, The rains fall soft upon your fields and, until we meet again, May God hold you in the palm of his hand..

xoxoxoxo Laura Lee

There aren't enough words or time to properly convey the impact that Jim had on my life or the life of my family.  He was a brother and best friend to my sister and brother-in-law, an honorary uncle to my nieces, and to me he was the one with a good strong shoulder and a laugh to brighten your day.  He always seemed to be there during the "firsts" and "lasts"--the first time Tom met the crew, when Tom first asked me to marry him, when my son first rolled over, the last blowout party at the townhouse and my last Christmas in Denver.  When I think that it was only 6 months since I last saw him and how in that span of time, it just good to see him again.  Doing "shots" of his homemade mead or him donning the black santa hat.  I look at those pictures now and it breaks my heart to know that he is no longer there.  I should be mad at him for leaving all of us before we were ready for him to.  But the problem is that you were never ready for him to leave.  He would fill a room with his presence the moment he walked in and you immediately knew when he was gone.  While I should be mad at him, I just can't.  You could never be mad at him. 

Jim, Hackey, we miss you so very much.  To his loving family, we offer our sincerest condolences and hope that time will heal the raw wound.  We shall remember the good times, and live life to the fullest as he would have wanted us too.

Goodbye "hot sauce", may you forever be missed, loved and rest in peace.

My Uncle Hackey and i were very close!  HE was the person to call when you were mad at the world you can call him and he would be there in no time he would walkin to the room and see his bid blue eyes and his bid warm hug would just blow all of your problems away hhis laugh would just make you forget about the world!!! 2 of his very good friends John Balenskie i also know him as BUBU and Steve Meyer my uncle steve tis was espesally hard for them they were the closest friends that he saw.   I remember sitting on his bike when i was younger he would started it up and i would scream because it would scare me i would turn around and hold on to him for dearlife amd we were still in park!! he would laugh so hard....... I miss him so much!!! he left me and so many others way way to sooon i keep turning around to ssee him but he ist there I LOVE YOU se you agian some day uncle Hackey     

                                             !!!!!! I PROMISE !!!!!!

My friendship with Hacksaw really began on the 4th of July, 1990, even though we had known each other for several years before that.  I had been feuding with him, over a woman, for 2 years.  We met up at Motorhead Island (John's place) in North Carolina.  I didn't know he was coming and might never have come had I known.  Shortly after my arrival, John, Hackie and I ended up in an all-star wrestling match of biblical proportions.  Any of you who know the three of us can understand that I expected to end up on the losing end of that battle.  One good shot of catching him in the chest with both feet and launching him across the room and all of my anger was gone. 

Over the next 18 years we built on that friendship every day.  He was not nearly the sterotypical biker that he often initially was taken for, he was one of the most intelligent, self educated people that it has ever been my privilege to know.  He was a rennaisance man, he seemed to be able to have a conversation with anyone about anything, never purporting he knew more than he did.  Even after 18 years, I think I always ended up knowing something new after every discussion.

I will miss all of those nights, at the end of the party, when we were the last ones standing, when we would stay up to watch the sun rise having some discussion about some political philosophy, a band we liked (old or new), religious beliefs we did or did not agree with, some ancient culture we were both curious about, or (probably more often) friendship, women, and drinking.  I will miss seeing my girls faces light up and hearing them yell  "Uncle Hacksaw!!!" and running into his arms on his arrival at my house.  I will miss our Thursday pool lunches and Sunday pool league.  I will miss my brother Hacksaw.

I agree with Johnny that I am a richer man for having been so close to such an incredible man, and I too will look forward to seeing him where ever we might end up after this life. Slainte my friend!

Cindy reminded me of a story that was pure Hacksaw.  It was August 1993 and we were having a party in our tiny apartment in a less than great neighborhood.  When it was just he and I left standing about 4am, Hackie went out to his truck to get some more music and was not happy to discover he had been burglarized.  I think he was more angry about the violation than about the loss of his stereo and the broken window.  He returned to the apartment, asked for my shotgun, then promptly returned to the sidewalk in front of his truck.  With the shotgun propped against his hip, he then announced at the top of his voice that he would like to discuss the issue with the individual(s) responsible for the act.  Hackie was never one to mince words or make idle threats.  He was one of a kind.